Lately I’ve felt the desire for a guru. I have really powerful teachers that have pointed me towards truth for a few years now. I find myself immediately able to connect with truth when I listen to their words. So what is this desire for a guru? I don’t even believe in needing one.
I think part of this feeling is a desire to connect with love – my love. I’ve felt unconditional love growing in its expression through me. That’s one part.
“I remember my first visit with my guru. He had shown that he read my mind. So I looked at the grass and I thought, ‘My god, he’s going to know all the things I don’t want people to know.’ I was really embarrassed. Then I looked up and he was looking directly at me with unconditional love.”-Ram Dass
It has been a long time since I looked to another to be my leader or my teacher. By that, I mean surrendering some aspect of self in order to be open to inspiration or new possibilities. That’s a good thing, because I also tended to surrender responsibility and then felt disappointed in the relationship. But…I crave being inspired to deeper divinity.
“When I met my Guru, he told me: “You are not what you take yourself to be. Find out what you are. Watch the sense ‘I am’, find your real Self.” I obeyed him, because I trusted him. I did as he told me. All my spare time I would spend looking at myself in silence. And what a difference it made, and how soon!
My teacher told me to hold on to the sense ‘I am’ tenaciously and not to swerve from it even for a moment. I did my best to follow his advice and in a comparatively short time I realized within myself the truth of his teaching. All I did was to remember his teaching, his face, his words constantly. This brought an end to the mind; in the stillness of the mind I saw myself as I am — unbound.
I simply followed (my teacher’s) instruction which was to focus the mind on pure being ‘I am’, and stay in it. I used to sit for hours together, with nothing but the ‘I am’ in my mind and soon peace and joy and a deep all-embracing love became my normal state. In it all disappeared – myself, my Guru, the life I lived, the world around me. Only peace remained and unfathomable silence.” – Nisargadatta Maharaj
That seems so beautiful. And so far out of my reach as an experience. Which is absolutely false.
“And so you begin to find out that your teachers are often people who have been right around you. They’re called Upa Gurus, as opposed to Sat Gurus. The Sat Guru is somebody who beckons from beyond. He’s somebody who’s all finished. The Upa Guru is anybody or anything along the way that points to the path that helps you along a little. So that even your enemies are often your Upa Gurus because they wake you up to a place you’re not, which helps you to get free of that place, which helps you get on with it. So you learn to honor everybody you meet as your teacher when you see that there is nothing else you can do but be conscious, for the good of yourself and all your fellow men, and to bring you closer to the place you’re trying most to get to by all the other means you thought you were working on.” -Ram Dass
For the love of the guru…for the love of all…for the love of my true self…I am.