Listening to the Calling


The sick body is the voice of the fearful mind. – Byron Katie

It has been two years since my two week retreat to Brazil to see John of God. It was a very personal experience and I didn’t share alot of it with people.

I have been invited a few times to make a return journey. I have declined because the Calling wasn’t there.

I was driving to work, listening to my meditation CD, when my awareness and energy returned to the Casa in Abadiânia, Brazil. I have completed the work I started there. And it is time to go deeper.

I have listened to many people who have been to the Casa describe remarkably similar experiences to my own. There are some commonalities that occur for all of us. This is not a stereotypical faith healing. There are no promises made and not fulfilled. There is no negation of medical practice.  There is simply healing.

Healing means releasing or removing all that does not align with divine nature. Some people may go to see John of God expecting a cure similar to when one takes medicine for a headache or when your appendix is removed. That is not what healing is.

One of the women in our group died a few months after returning. While her body was not cured, she spoke about how the pilgrimage has prepared her for a peaceful and fearless death. For those of us who shared that with her, it was impossible to deny the perfection of her experience.

For me, I was ready to release my entire life. I moved through a transition in my life where everything changed. My relationships ended. My job ended. My codependency ended. My anxiety attacks ended. My financial lack ended. My fear ended.

Did it all dissolve instantly?  No, it has taken two years to fully integrate my work from that trip. My body is stronger and healthier than ever.  I have more fulfillment than any time in my life.  I am a full expression of self.

And now I feel called back – to what and why is unclear.  Last time I was ready to die to my whole life.  Right now,  this wasn’t my plan. (I am waiting to hear if i have been accepted by a much desired teacher.) I am doing other things!

So I will stop and seek  what is whispering to me in my longing. Whatever the Calling is, I am listening.


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